How to Write Your Own Wedding Vows

Writing your own vows can add a tender and unique touch to your ceremony and express more fully the love you have for each other. If you and your partner are considering writing your own vows for your upcoming nuptials, here are a few tips that may help you along the way…

Sincerity

No matter how poetic or elaborate your vows are, nothing makes as powerful an impression as vows that come straight from the heart. Instead of trying to replicate other people’s vows or use language that is foreign or uncomfortable, think about the kind of marriage you want, the kind of promises you want to make and the reasons you want to make them to your partner. While it isn’t necessarily crucial to read them to each other before your wedding day, it may be a good idea to have some idea of the length and tone of each other’s vows, so as to avoid an embarrassing situation in which you speak for four minutes straight and your groom to be keeps it short and sweet with but a few lines…definitely not an idea situation.

Structure

One way to create meaningful, cohesive vows is to follow an agreed-upon structure when you are both writing them. One template many couples find useful is to write one sentence about what you love about the other person, one sentence about what you love about the relationship, and a final sentence outlining the promises you are making for the rest of your life. There are plenty of sample vows online if you’re looking for some inspiration, but generally couples find that those three subject areas provide them with all the inspiration they need to create personalised, meaningful and memorable wedding vows.

Practicality

One thing that many couples overlook is the logistical issue that is reading their own vows. While it looks wonderful when the bride and groom have memorised their vows, more often than not the pressure of the day and the sheer weight of importance pressing down upon them at that moment renders them temporarily unable to remember their own names, let alone complex vows, so a back up script is always a prudent idea. Another thing to consider is who will hold the vows while you read them—if there is a microphone involved it can look messy to fumble around with a piece of paper as well, so organising exactly who will hold what can make the entire ordeal run a lot more smoothly.

While it is easy to get caught up in the minutia of decor and guest lists and honeymoon destinations that surround weddings, it is important to remember that the most significant details of a wedding are the promises made between the bride and groom. If these are honest, meaningful and from the heart, there is much more chance that your fabulous wedding will be followed by an equally fabulous marriage.